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Eilene Zimmerman's BlogBLOG: So This Is Christmas
So… this is Christmas, as the song goes. It’s hard for me not to compare this year’s holiday season with the last one, when I was still reeling from the end of my marriage, two months past my ex-husband’s move out of the house, and my kids were struggling to come to terms with what all of it meant. I was struggling too. A year later, I feel like I’m walking on more solid ground. Usually. I did the usual running around this year, for both Hanukkah and Christmas—an American Chrismukkah, no doubt—and, depending on what you believe, that’s either a good or bad thing. Religion has little to do with the holiday season for us. It’s more about being together, eating too many sweets, having lots of lights around (whether the menorah, the tree or just strings of lights), the smell of cinnamon and nutmeg, and the presents. Even in a recession, we buy things. We may buy less of them, we may buy cheaper things or wait until the last minute, but we’re buying. The Huffington Post’s crack team of holiday reporters told us yesterday that Christmas Eve is really “Black Friday, The Sequel” and if the snaking line of cars desperate to get into Fashion Valley mall yesterday was any indication, it’s likely true. An analyst with NDP Group told the Post “I’m calling it Fantastic Friday, because I really do think it’s going to be one of the busiest [shopping] days of the year.” The National Retail Federation predicts that holiday spending, when all is said and done, will reach $451.1 billion this year, up 3.3 percent over 2009. It’s also the biggest year over year increase since 2006. If we were to believe George Bush (and why, honestly, would we?), that would mean we’ve all done our patriotic duty to help the country get back on its financial feet. Although the reality is the recession drags on and after tomorrow, Christmas Day, there will still be nearly 10 percent unemployment in the country and a long, uphill climb to a healthy economy. Not to be Scrooge, of course. Maybe we all just want to forget what a tough year it’s been. Sometimes buying things for the people you love really makes you feel, well, holiday-ish. Much of what I bought my own kids were, actually, things they needed anyway, like pajamas and slippers and rain boots. But there’s also the requisite game for my son’s Nintendo DS, and sweaters and costume jewelry for my daughter. But nothing huge. I even got my ex-husband a couple of goodies, because unlike some families that split the holidays, we would each be broken-hearted having to do that—at least we would be right now—so we spend it together. I sit back now at the end of the year and take stock, like so many other people do, of 2010. I managed to accomplish all the goals—financial most of them—I set out to accomplish this year, as my marriage unwound. Most of the goals were just to separate mine from his and figure out what to do with what remained, how to save for retirement when someone else isn’t doing it for you, what house repairs must be made now and what must wait. Things like that. It’s also been a year since I started dating–and although there have been stretches when I just retreated–for the most part, it’s been an education. If you’re married, you think it would be exciting to date again–and it is. There’s a world of first kisses and flattery you just live without after years of domestic familiarity and kids…small things that get lost in the rush of everyday life. It’s a revelation in many ways to feel things when you haven’t felt much for a long time. But those feelings also include hurt, disappointment, self-doubt, frustration. It’s all a learning process—and it sounds so Pollyanna to write it—but it’s honestly true. And I’m grateful for the education. So here’s looking forward to 2011, all of it—the ups, the downs, the recessions and the recoveries. Happy New Year. Posted by Eilene Zimmerman on Fri, Dec 24th, 2010 Last updated Fri, Dec 24th, 2010
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